"THOU SHALL DISCOVER THE VERY BEST PARTS OF OURSELVES DURING SOME OF THE MOST PAINFUL PARTS OF LIFE"

Do you remember how it felt to have your heart broken? I mean reeeeally broken. The kind of heart-pain that leaves you listening to sad songs on purpose just so you can cry….or lying on your bed at night wondering what went so wrong….or how you could have made things better so that your love would’ve stayed…..That kind of “I’m-not-hungry-I-don’t-want-to-get-out-of-bed-it-hurts-to-move” heartbreak? Yes. That kind. L

I have friends whose daughters are now teenagers and as we all know, these are the very years in our child’s life that this sort of thing will inevitably happen and I guess as moms we just tell our daughters to go through the motions until they eventually come out of their funk, right??

Heck no! Of course not…Nu-uh…no way.

I have a friend whose daughter has recently experienced her first “real” heart break. My friend wondered how I might handle it if it were my daughter, Summer, who was experiencing the broken heart.

I thought about it for a minute and decided that this is what I think I would do…after I made the voodoo doll of the boy that hurt my baby girl…. (Ha! Only kidding…..sorta.) ;-)

I think I would spend a day letting her be really sad….just hugging and loving on her. And letting her eat all the ice-cream and listen to all the sad songs her little heart desires…

But come nightfall, we would have a really good “Mother-daughter” pow wow about the GOOD side of having to let something (or someone) go. There is a “good side” to all of this you know.

Here it is…. The “good side” of heartbreak:

#1. This kind of painful heartbreak won’t last forever. I will promise her that. She may have that little twinge of “I wonder where he is….or I wonder what he’s doing” for a little while, but as far as the core pain and torture that makes the tears fall so readily? That will end…..especially when someone else comes along and brings that old familiar smile to the heart.

#2. The good part of being on the receiving end of the hurt is that it gives you a new sense of empathy and compassion for a broken-hearted person. This will come in handy when a friend or loved one is going through the same thing. You can truly help heal a wounded heart if you’ve been there yourself. (which most of us have.)

#3. Also, one day, she will be on the other side of this heartbreak. She will find herself being the one to have to break things off with a boyfriend. So…it is good to know how it feels so that when you have to break things off,, you will do it in the kindest and most loving way.

**But there IS a “next step”…for those who are up for the challenge of it.**

If you do what I am going to suggest you do, not only will you feel empowered, but you will begin to regain self-confidence….and there if there is one thing I know about boys/men….it is that their species is totally attracted to CONFIDENCE.

You don’t even have to be the prettiest girl in the room. If you exude an air of confidence, the energy surrounding you is palpable! That is because confidence IS beautiful!!

Think about it…You might see a girl who is outwardly beautiful to look at, but if she lacks confidence and self-esteem OR is into her own looks way too much….she doesn’t seem as pretty after awhile, does she?

HOWEVER….you might find a girl who is “okay” looking, BUT because she LOVES who she is, laughs easily….and KNOWS how special she really is, she EXUDES confidence….and more people are drawn to her…in fact, everyone’s attracted to her…and people want to be around her!

So…here’s what you do.. If you are that girl with the broken heart:

Every single morning, get up, look in the mirror and say, “YOU freakin’ rock!” or something like that that will make you smile.

THEN, try to look your very best! (When you look your best, you FEEL your best!)

*Now, here’s THE KEY*

Wear a smile EVERYwhere you go. Every time you make eye contact with another person (male or female) SMILE at them. This does WONDERS!! Try it!

Even if you don’t feel happy yet, still do it!

Some say, “Fake it till you make it.” Or as I have now learned to say, “FAITH it till you make it.”

There is literally a chemical released in your body that goes straight to your brain every time you smile…and especially when you laugh. Your body responds to this chemical in a very positive way. SO DO IT!!...A LOT!

Finally, NEVER…and I mean, NE-E-E-EVER let the boy who broke your heart see you sad or depressed over him….EVER! Yu must trust me on this one… You WILL BE happy in his presence if it flippin’ kills you! Haha!

So…THIS is how I hope I will handle it when my Summer goes through her own heartbreak.

I’ve discovered that God always has such a remarkable way of allowing us to discover the very best parts of ourselves through some of the most painful parts of life.

So SMILE already….It’s all gonna be alright. ;-)

As ever,
Teri