Thou Shall Not Let Past Mistakes Define You

 "You are what you are and where you are because of what has gone into your mind.  You can change what you are and where you are by changing what goes into your mind." ~ Zig Ziglar

A couple of days ago, I boxed up some old children's books from my home and drove to the church where I would simply drop them off  at a "Book Drive" my church is having this month. 

There is usually someone at the information desk waiting to greet whomever walks in the lobby, but she wasn't there when I walked through the doors this time. 

In fact, on this particular day, there was actually nobody in the lobby but this one young, scruffy-looking fella.  He looked to be around 23-25 years-old.  He was a bit disheveled with brown curly hair and he had a little tattoo of a tear right under his left eye.  When I walked through the door with my first box of books, he put the lobby phone down and rushed over like a gentleman to take the box from me.

I smiled and politely thanked him.  He went back to hang up with whomever was on the other line of that phone call and as I was walking towards the door, he asked if I needed anymore help.

"Well, friend, as a matter of fact, I do!"  I continued, "This next box is much larger and a bit heavier, so if you could get one end, I'll get the other and we can bring it inside! Thanks so much!"

As we were walking out to my car, he says, "Hey, can I ask you something?"  

I turn around, "Sure thing....and by the way, what part of South Louisiana are you from with that cajun accent?"

He smiled and I noticed a couple of teeth missing.  He goes on to say,  "Well, I'm gonna be honest with you, ma'am... I just got out of jail a few days ago and I have no way of getting  back home to New Orleans.  I came here to Shreveport after Hurricane Katrina hit a few years back"  (I nod in acknowledgement) "And ma'am...well.....I did some really bad things and I've been in jail ever since.  My family has disowned me and I have no one to call. I don't know what to do."

To be honest, my thoughts at that moment were, "Okay...okay....so you need money.....gotcha."  But he interjects as he lifts my second box out of my trunk all by himself, "Ma'am, I'm not asking for money, I really want to figure out how to get outta here and back home. Is there a place for people like me?  I mean, I know I've done some bad things in my past but I just wanna go home."  

He drops the books in the proper place in the corner of the lobby and then looks at me with the saddest eyes.

I felt such compassion in that moment, "What's your name, friend?"

"Adam" he replied.

"Well...Adam.....I wish I had an answer for you.  I really and truly don't know what your next step could be other than giving you a little cas.... wait!  Look where we are standing, Adam.  In church. I know exactly what you can do.  It's what I always do when I don't have a clue what my next "step" should be.  Have you tried praying about this?

"Yes Ma'am.....I been prayin' all day."

"Hmmmm......well, good! Then keep doing that and you know what? I will too."

He just kind of stared off for a moment as if he was trying to figure out what to do next. 

I break his frozen stare and say, "Well, Adam..... I'll tell you what I'll do.  I will give you a little cash and just know that when I drive off that I will be praying for you. I promise you that.

He looked at me funny and sad at the same time, so I added, "And when I pray, I will pray that God guides your steps and helps bring peace and comfort to your heart....and I will also pray that the wounds of your heart will not only mended, but replaced with joy and happiness and peace.

As we are walking to my car to get my purse (which had a mere $7.00 cash in there), two of the church workers came outside and started giving him advice on where he should go and who could best help him here in town.

I'm looking at this helpless young man and all of the sudden he looks like a little boy to me.  His shoulders were slumped, eyes facing down and pure sadness emanating from every pore.  

Without saying anything, my chin begins quivering like I might cry.  I am looking at these two sweet women trying to help him....and I'm about to cry?!?  What the heck is happening?!?  I have got to get out of here!

Before I leave, I feel compelled to share something with Adam.  
I break into their conversation and say (as I give him the little bit of cash I had on me), "I'm sorry guys, I have to go pick up kids from school, but Adam, I gotta tell you something first before I leave.... Listen, Your mistakes?.....whatever it was that you did in your past?  It doesn't have to define you, friend. It's what you do from this point on that will ultimately define who you really are inside. 

Good luck and God Bless, friend.

I immediately got in my car as the lump forms in my throat.  At this point, I have tears stinging my eyes and I feel such sadness for him.

And it got me thinking..... 

How many of us have, at some point in our lives, felt like whatever mistake or poor decision we made was THE ABSOLUTE WORST thing in the world that could have EVER happened to us?  We may have felt like that one mistake......that one doggone bad choice was going to "label" or "define" us FOREVER!  No one would EVER look at us the same again...EVER!  That's it! RUINED forever!

Ever feel like that??

And did it??  Did it "ruin" you forever?  Was it?!...Was it truly THE worst thing that ever happened to you? 

I bet you made it through, didn't you?  I'd be willing to bet that you even grew from it....learned a valuable lesson and maybe even evolved into a better person because of it.  Am I right?  ....Maybe even strengthened your spiritual muscles a little bit? 

This may sound really far out....maybe even crazy, but some people actually admit (after enough time has passed) that they were actually GLAD the mistake happened!  Huh?

It's true.  Some people spend their life using what they learned themselves to help other wounded souls who might be going through the exact same heartache and suffering that they once experienced.

I'm starting to get this feeling that every single part of our life journey is divinely and systematically set in motion to actually help us.....to prepare us for something down the road that is far Greater than anything we could ever imagine.


I believe that when we are struggling and God doesn't intervene in the way that makes sense to us, He is actually using our situation for good in ways we can't possibly imagine during those hard times of struggle.

I believe, bottom line, we all have a purpose to fulfill.  Every single one of us has a destiny..a mission here on earth that is ours and ours alone.

All we have to do is EMBRACE our journey .......and TRUST IT.

*So remember....your mistakes, poor choices, bad decisions?  None of those define you....None.  It truly is what you do from that point on that will ultimately define your true strength of character.

So buckle up...and enjoy your journey.  *All of it.

*Just thinking "out loud" today.

Have a great one!

Teri