~~Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe
As a little girl, I observed and thought about things that most kids my age probably didn't. I was the little girl who did her 5th grade Social Studies Project on "Women's Rights" because at that time, in the very early '80's, Sandra Day O'Connor had just become the first woman to be appointed to the Supreme Court!.....and that fascinated me!
As part of my project, I took my little tape recorder and walked around my neighborhood, knocking on doors asking the "woman of the house" if I could ask her a few questions regarding "Women's Rights".
All of the women were gracious enough to allow me to record their opinion on my trusty little tape recorder. I left my house feeling like I was embarking on a little trip of "solidarity" with all the other women in my neighborhood. I told my mom that I'd be back in no time because my questions were pretty simple. I mean, OF COURSE every woman is happy with the ERA (Equal Rights of Women), right? No matter her age, race or creed, any woman will be THRILLED with the appointment of Judge Sandra Day O'Connor and what this means for women everywhere, right?!
WRONG!! I remember being SHOCKED at some of the responses from all of these different women! And each one felt so strongly about their opinion. I had one elderly woman angrily tell me that it was the first step in the "demise" of our country! (I remember this response specifically because I had to look up the word "demise" when I got home!). One woman said she hoped that I would understand that a woman's place was not in the pulpit, politics, nor in business! She wanted to encourage me to be a "real" woman and remember my "place". It's all on tape!
All I could think about was getting back to my mom so she could hear what some of these women said! How could they not all agree with the ERA?!
"Oh, Mama is gonna DIE when I get home and tell her!" I thought.
Well, this little "experiment" was my FIRST indoctrination into understanding that not everybody will think like me! And at the time, it didn't feel good. I mean, I didn't like it at all! When I rushed through the door I hollered for mom to come and "just listen to the crazy ladies on my tape recorder that we live by!" She listened...and listened....and listened. But she never frowned. She never shook her head in disbelief. She never got angry. I was a little perplexed because all she did while listening was smile and sometimes giggle to herself.
"Wait!! What?!? Aren't WE mad that these women who don't appreciate what other women are doing to "break that glass ceiling" for all of us?! Aren't we angry that they don't feel gratitude for the Sandra Day O'Connor's of the world?? Don't we wanna move away from these crazy hags who now look at me as part of the "demise"?!? C'MON, Mama, let's "picket" somebody!" (Haha!)
Nope. We shouldn't be angry at all. Not according to Mom. After the tape was over, she just smiled and hugged me tightly and said that she was proud of me.....Proud that I was asking them the tough questions and then listening to their opinions. She told me her favorite part was how I allowed them to express themselves without trying to change their opinion.
Huh? Wait.... I'm confused. What?
Mom explained that the only way we can truly grow and strengthen in our own belief system is if others challenge us on those thoughts and beliefs. She went on to express that our "job" is never to judge another's "life journey"....even if that journey looks like it's taking an "off-road" detour. Our job is to love our fellow man, period. God is Love, after all.
I want to share a little "snippet" of my dad's credo that he actually wrote about twenty years before his early death. He was about 38 years old when he wrote this and apparently Dad wanted us to fully comprehend his thoughts and feelings regarding another person's quest to discover their own truth, their own way and even their own God.
It is a beautiful reminder to me that we are each on a personal journey towards Greatness. God knows the directions we need to take, even if our neighbor doesn't understand it. It doesn't matter. All that matters is that you listen and trust where HE is taking you in this life and respect that HE is doing the same for all of those around, even those whose opinions differ from our own......maybe even especially those who differ in their opinions from our own.
Here's the "snippet" from Dad:
"The only way I can personally grow is to question my own thoughts and the thoughts of others. I have been unable to grow by sitting and listening to others and accepting what is said as "the way". On the other hand, if someone can grow by sitting and listening to others and accepting what is said as "the way" then, for them, it is "the way." I think we are all on separate paths. I think our beliefs are based on what we grew up hearing, what we have heard from others, what we have read, and liked, and from our own feelings and experiences. How in the world should we expect someone else to believe the same way we believe? Why do we judge someone wrongly or put them at a lower level on the "Christian Totem Pole" if they don't agree with our own beliefs, or if they don't say the same words that we say? We are just on different paths. No one is more right and no one more wrong."
My dad was a firm believer in being open and honest with his thoughts about God. If he drew criticism from others for his thoughts, then he felt it was all the better for him. This could only make him dig a little deeper in his soul, build stronger spiritual muscles and truly work at understanding the truth in the way that rang true in his own heart.
So, while it is so easy (sometimes even too easy) to judge others for their thoughts and beliefs, why don't we take the approach of my mom all those years ago and just smile....maybe even giggle about it....and let others have their opinions without getting so worked up.
Instead, let's focus on our ability to listen......to really listen to another's opinion. It can only help us grow....ya know? ;-)
Have a great day everybody!
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