"Thou Shall Leave Behind a Meaningful Legacy"

"In the end, it's not what you do for your children, but what you've taught them to do for themselves."
~~Ann Landers

Legacy.  What does this really mean?  And why is it so important for us to leave a good one behind once we've been removed from this earth?

As a mom, it is my job to discipline, guide, lead, and direct my children.  This is my loving duty as their mother and it is because they are my whole world and mean everything to me that I take this part of my job so seriously.

In order for me to feel like I have successfully completed my mission as their mom, I must be able to witness their progress with each stage of their lives... The ultimate goal being that I am able to watch them grow and develop into kind, loving and decent human beings.

I remember one night, my oldest son, Steele, was teasing his two siblings relentlessly.  I was in the laundry room listening...hoping he would do the right thing and stop the teasing.  However, being a typical "gotta-egg-it-on" big brother, he didn't stop this particular time.  
I was thinking about all of the ways I had tried disciplining each of them when it came to this sort of thing. ...and wondering why none of them ever seemed to work. ha!

To be fair, Steele truly is a great kid and big brother, but there are those times that he, quite frankly, chooses not to be.  This was one of those times. 

Instead of my usual punishment of taking away something he loves, or giving him "time" in his room without the luxury of getting to turn on ESPN, I tried something different.  I walked out of the laundry room, threw my load of clean clothes on the couch to be folded, then turned to look at Steele and said, "Steele, head to your room.  I have a question for you.  I need a minute to cool down before I come in there, but I'll be in there just as soon as I fold these clothes."

As Steele closed his bedroom door, I thought, "WHAT THE HECK?"  What kind of question was I gonna ask him??  Lord, you are gonna have to help me with this one.  I have no idea why I said that!  I actually didn't need time to cool down, I needed time to think about my plan of action and what question I was going to ask once I got in there!

All at once, it came to me!  I walked into his room where he was lying on his bed.  I sat on the edge of it and said, "Steele, do you know what a legacy is?"  His look of confusion gave me his answer so I added, "Simply put, a legacy is what someone or something is remembered for once they are dead and gone from earth."  

He just stared, so I continued, "You want to be a professional football player right?  Well, I believe you will make it.  Without a doubt you will make happen whatever you set your mind to.  And you know what?  Daddy, Summer, Slade and I will be with you rooting for you every single step of the way."

I continued with this thought, "When that day comes there will be little boys across America wearing your jersey, people will be chanting your name and reporters will be swarming to you for any comment you may have to make.  And we will all be there.

Now, suppose a reporter pulls Summer and Slade off to the side and asks them this question (in that deep reporter voice):
'Yes, you are the brother and sister of our national hero, Steele "the real deal" Netterville.  You grew up with him, right.  So you MUST tell us, what kind of brother was he to the both of you?'"

*Steele is hanging on to every word so I ask, "Steele, what do you hope they say?  Do you hope they say that you were mean and grumpy and always teasing?  OR, do you hope they look into the camera and say, 'Wow, if you think our brother is awesome ON the football field, you should've seen the kind of brother he was to us OFF the field.  He loved us, protected us and cared about us for our entire lives.'"

I then, methodically asked him this question as I looked straight into his eyes, "Steele, as their big brother, what kind of legacy do you want to leave for them?  Because guess what?  It's all up to you.  YOU are the author of your legacy.  YOU determine right now what people will think of you in the future.  So what's it gonna be?"

At this point, poor Steele's little chin began quivering as tears began stinging his eyes.  He answered through tears, "I want to leave a good legacy behind, Mama.  A really good one."

I hugged him tightly, reminded him of how proud I was of him already and that I had no doubt that that is exactly what he would do.  Leave his brother and sister and the world with a good legacy.

I have thought about this so many times since then and asked myself that same question I asked Steele that night:  What is my legacy for this world?  What will people remember about me far after I am gone and removed from this earth?

My hope is that people will remember me as someone they could count on for a warm smile, a hearty laugh, a kind word, a loving and compassionate heart .....and mostly I want to be known as a  woman who left behind three incredibly kind, loving and decent human beings who all made a positive difference in this world.


What about you?

What kind of legacy do you wish to leave behind? 


Just a thought.... ;-)

Teri